A Letter to my Husband on Father's Day

It seems like yesterday you were reading Dr. Seuss books to my swollen pregnant belly and singing "You Are My Sunshine" to the tiny little boy we were so excited to meet. Fantasizing about watching football with him on your knee, teaching him to ride a bike and taking fishing trips was part of many conversations. You baby proofed like a champ & spent countless nights building "must have" toys from incomplete directions. You were ready and so excited to be a father.

When each of our sons was born, you revealed yourself to be the father I hoped you would be. You adored them and showered them with affection. You put their needs before yours and cherished every minute you had with them. You were silly, animated, affectionate and attentive. You filled me with pride and adoration, because you were such a wonderful father to my precious sons.

Never during our long ago late night chats about our growing family did we talk about researching developmental pediatricians, behavior therapists and schools that offered special education. My guess is that you had no idea what gluten was, no less how to avoid it. Autism was not part of our vocabulary. It was not part of the plan.

Autism has taught you the significance of perception. You have learned to appreciate our boys, for who they are, not who you thought they should be. You participate in experiences, rather than openly lamenting what could have been. You love through actions, respect and support.

I want to express my sincere gratitude that you are the father of our sons. You are there to hold me up when I am emotionally drained from "the world of autism" and try to understand when I don't have much left to give. You patiently expose our boys to typical childhood interests without imposing your own needs or expectations. You love them unconditionally and are raising them to be happy, self-confident and responsible people.

What I admire most about your parenting is that, fundamentally, you want to be your "best self" for the boys. You are keenly aware of the responsibility of being a father and you continue to rise to the occasion.

My heart is full because you are the man who will help teach my sons to be men.

Happy Father's Day. I love you.